The ghost of Christmas past: Cold turkey – colon cleansing and caffeine catastrophes…

...

With all the festivities over, trees taken down and fairy lights a fleeting memory, what is there to look forward to except leftover turkey (yes, in January) and the latest diet fad?

I'm not a big eater but since we've gotten married, my husband and I have eaten way more than the average couples'
share of food. Partly to blame for this is:

1) Buffet breakfasts while on honeymoon
2) Generous friends cooking for us
3) Having an amazing cook for a MiL
4) Being a newly married couple - everyone wants to wine and
toast you!
5)
Having
Marks
& Spencer

food and Waitrose on our road.

And the rest is down to greed. So it was with enthusiasm that we decided to do a colon cleanse and received our Blessed Herb parcels with a childish sense of anticipation.

There are many types of colon cleanse programmes out there
but we chose this one because it came recommended by my mum who is totally into all this health stuff and ignores my protests that pizza just tastes nicer than red rice.

The Blessed Herbs colon cleanse is an 8-day intensive programme which works to remove accumulated debris from the intestines. For the first three days you gradually cut down your regular food intake while taking their herbal products to absorb toxins and stimulate the digestion system. Then for the next five days you go cold turkey. Not lukewarm turkey....COLD. So a liquids-only diet with no food. You have to take the herbal products six times a day with apple juice and loads of water so your stomach isn't completely empty but
my goodness
it has been hard!

A couple of days into the programme,
Fish -
who we now realise was clearly a complete caffeine addict - started having aches and pains which I am sure are down to coffee withdrawal symptoms and every time we see a food advert or a
cookery show we go into dribbling meltdown.

We've got one day left and are already planning our 'freedom breakfast' on Tuesday although they do advise you to start slowly when
re-introducing food into your body...whatever.

But aside from the petty arguing because we're both
starving and moody,
it does feel good to know we're having a real 'clean-out' and my stomach was definitely flatter when I did my weekly Louboutin training* this afternoon.

I won't be posting my results on here but if you're interested in other peoples'... CLICK HERE

(DISCLAIMER: For those of you with squeamish sensitivities, I'd advise you to click away now. To another blog post of course, not away from my blog...)

Convinced? They're currently doing a buy 1 get 1 half price offer so you too can enjoy colon cleansing with your husband/partner/parent/sibling/housemate!


*Louboutin training: The art of training my feet to walk in my ridiculously sexy new Louboutins ready for my February weddings!

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  • 7 responses to “The ghost of Christmas past: Cold turkey – colon cleansing and caffeine catastrophes…”

    1. I will do this I promise! Just had so much on this week!

    2. Anonymous says:

      The wedding and reception are both being held at my local Church in Bristol. It's more of a 'Church Hall' kind of building than traditional – large rectangular room with carpet and plastic chairs, no stage or platform at the front just a projector screen and dodgy heating so it's likely to be cold 😉
      I'm a larger lady so any ideas that I can adapt to work for size voluptuous would be most welcome…

      Thanks for posting early, I really appreciate it! xx

    3. Sure! I was going to do one for nearer the weddings in marriage week – 7-14 Feb – but will do it this weekend instead 🙂
      Where is the wedding you are going to?

    4. Anonymous says:

      I have to say the thing that I noticed most was the 'February weddings' bit – I'm also going to a wedding in February and the first thing I thought after offering my congratulations was "What am I going to wear?!?"

      I'd love it if you could do a blog post on what to wear for a winter wedding, pleeeeeeeease

    5. pamela says:

      hmmm….. very interesting and tempting. i do need to a colon cleanse but not eating for 5days is slightly making me worry. But well done for finishing the colon cleansing regime. it definitely shows strong determination and willpower…..

      yeah i think i need to look into it ( *winks*)

    6. Eww rice cakes are disgusting!

    7. ok, this is slightly worrying! no food for 5 days doesn't sound good. What's wrong with rice cakes and Edward not ordering a full breakfast feast when he goes out?!!!

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